A Tale Told by an Idiot

Shakespeare wrote in Macbeth, "Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

This rather melancholy observation on the fleeting nature of human life is analogous to our virtual existence in Cyberspace.  Day in and day out many people, myself included, ply our trades in one form or another in this great global computer network.  We sound off about our lives and our work, we revel in our triumphs, we mourn our tragedies, and we suffer our defeats.  We twitter and we tweet we blog and we browse.  We celebrate the advent of new life as we lament the passing of old. 

Where once only the privileged gave voice to their brief lives, now there are millions who can strut and fret their hour upon the stage.  Where once pen and parchment and later the printing press largely determined one’s enduring legacy, now a few simple lines of HTML and the right storage medium all but assure a lasting memorial. 

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5 Reasons the iPhone will never come to Verizon

Here we go again…Bloomberg is reporting that the all elusive, two people familiar with the plans, indicate that Verizon will begin selling the iPhone in January of 2011.

Hogwash.  Here are my top five reasons that the iPhone will never come to Verizon. 

1.    A deafening silence would fall on the blogosphere as millions of blogs would have nothing to report. Without the ability to perpetuate this rumor it would be a death knell to the Internet.

2.    Apple is not in it for the money.  They are all about helping the little guy.  In this case, AT&T is the little guy.  We have all heard the complaints, and who hasn’t seen Verizon’s coverage map commercials? 

3.    Verizon cannot possibly have a better phone than other carriers.  It flies in the face of common sense. 

4.    Hell would freeze over, pigs would fly, the sun would rise in the west, and chickens would grow teeth.  Choose your idiom, but it’s not going to happen.  After all who wants to live in a world where our commonly held beliefs are turned upside down and inside out?

5.    And my final reason…shhh, don’t tell my Droid…but secretly I still want one, and of course the Fates, have already determined that this cannot be.

Let’s see if I eat crow on this one.

My TV Repair Story

My son yelled from the living room.  “Hey Dad, what’s wrong with the TV?”

When I heard this, my immediate response was the usual, “I don’t know; what did you do to it?”  He had been using it nonstop with his Xbox for the past several days; and I was certain that he had done something to damage it.

I rose from my chair in my office, walked into the living room, and was met by a “clicking” sound emanating from my 52” Samsung LCD TV.

“No … way,” I thought.  Well, that’s not exactly what I thought…  There were other choice expletives racing through my mind.  This was a $2500 television and it was not even two years old!  There is no way this could happen.

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Survey Says...

Here is a set of random questions I found on the Internet.  Beneath each question I have posted my answer.


50 Random Questions

1. How do you like your eggs?
Over medium.  But this seems difficult for many to master so I usually settle for scrambled.

2. Who are you in love with?
My wife.

3. Ketchup or Mustard?
Hmm...that really depends.  If it's a hamburger its ketchup, if it's a hot dog then it's mustard.

4. Do you prefer to sleep or eat?
I am rather fond of both, but if I have to choose, I would say I prefer to eat.

5. When is the last time you went to the mall?
Just before Christmas.

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